I noticed the sensation generated by the release of the series Heated Rivalry on Crave. It piqued my interest. I subscribed to Crave and settled in to watch the first episode of the series. Based on the first episode of the series, I expected the rest to be decidedly underwhelming. Thankfully, I found the following episodes much improved. I get what the storyline is about; at least I think so. The story is about two young men, one from Canada — his name is Shane Hollander — and the other from Russia — his name is Ilya Rozanov — who are rising stars in elite-level Junior Hockey and fierce competitors. They go on to become professional hockey players and captains of their respective teams. Each one has issues with his family and feels the pressures of navigating the byzantine world of professional hockey. Their story progresses through several years; along the way, they found they had a mutual sexual attraction. That further complicated things for them.

They play on opposing teams in different cities, which makes it difficult to see one another without letting the cat out of the bag. They are determined to keep their relationship private. They have discrete liaisons in their hotel rooms when their teams are matched. Their sexual encounters are fleeting and devoid of intimacy. As one of the characters said after a sexual encounter, “We didn’t even kiss.” It was, as a reviewer in a gay magazine observed, like a series of Grindr hookups between the two. The sex scenes were mechanical and left nothing to the imagination. After each tryst, they quickly parted, lest anyone find out what they were up to. The series is billed as a gay romance, but the emphasis is on sex. I can appreciate the character’s feeling the need for discretion. It took me back to my university days in the 1980s when, as a young gay man, discretion was essential. I remember tiptoeing around with my boyfriend when we lived in shared accommodation in separate residences with fellow students. That, and when we rented a two-bedroom apartment, our landlord thought we were roommates, and nothing more. Where there is a will, there is a way.

I like a good gay romance. A romance develops between the characters as the series progresses. In a pivotal scene, another player, upon winning the Cup with his team, beckons to his boyfriend in the audience, who comes onto the ice where they share a kiss. How would hockey fans react to such a scene in reality? I do not know. I think most people are fine with two men in love, but personally, I prefer a little decorum in public, whether you are gay or heterosexual. The scene drove home the point that the series is a fantasy. What I do not like about the series is the salacious interest of some viewers in the personal lives of the young actors, Connor Storrie and Hudson Williams, who play the rivals and lovers. They are actors. What goes on in their personal lives is their business, be they gay or straight. Actors generally like to be appreciated for their talent, not who they are bedding off-screen.

Another point that bothers me is that in the numerous online discussions in the entertainment media and fan groups, there are references to the characters’ so-called “queer experience.” There are two men in love, a gay and a bisexual man who struck up a relationship. Yes, some men experience same-sex attraction and share intimacy, just as men and women do. Do you say that the male and female characters in a romance who fall in love and give in to their mutual sexual attraction have a “heteronormative experience?” Love is love when it is between consenting adults, regardless of their sexual orientation. It bothers me how so many people fixate on what they imagine goes on in a gay male couple’s bedroom. Gay men have sex like anyone else; it is about finding what pleases you and remains within your comfort level. Sex is something you learn. It is about teaching a new dog old tricks. Just as when I was seventeen and found myself alone in the backseat of my dad’s station wagon with a girl I met on a high school band exchange, I knew that I wanted to hold and kiss her. Beyond that, well, I had the basic idea of how men and women have sex, but I was bewildered. We did not “go all the way” that night, but I had my first taste of forbidden fruit.

Two years later, while serving as a reservist in the Canadian Army, I befriended a man in my unit. His name was John, and he had blond hair and blue eyes. I had a massive crush on him. I remember the times we spent alone at his mother’s house, seated on the living room floor and listening to Beatles albums. I had an overwhelming desire to hold and kiss him, but beyond that, I was unsure of what else we might do. People who dislike gay men often retort that “there is nothing more disgusting than two men fucking each other in the ass.” That is the blanket assumption of so many when they imagine two men being intimate. Granted, some gay men indulge in anal sex, just as there are straight people who do. To each their own. Just know that it is not universal. I never disclosed my feelings for my friend John. It was in 1980, and homosexuality was grounds for dismissal from the Canadian Army at the time. What I knew for sure at the time was that I had no interest in “fucking him in the ass,” or having him do that to me.

The series is a massive hit, and congratulations to the cast and crew who brought the story to life. Three seasons are planned, and I look forward to watching and seeing how the story plays out. I hope that viewers can appreciate the story as a romance and leave out the “queer” references and the baser assumptions of how gay men share intimacy that only demean the experience of two men in love.

Posted by Geoffrey