Category Archives: Performing arts

Waste no more time arguing what a good man should be. Be one. – Marcus Aurelius

The Cambridge Dictionary defines masculinity as “the characteristics that are traditionally thought to be typical of or suitable for men.” (Cambridge Dictionary) The Collins Dictionary elaborates on the definition of masculinity, stating, “There are many positive qualities that have historically been defined as either masculine (leadership, strength, courage) or feminine (nurturing, compassion, caring). In reality, people are individuals with a unique combination of attributes.” (Collins Dictionary) Fair enough, it is possible for men and women to have both masculine and feminine qualities, or you can be a masculine woman or a feminine man. Either way, it is fine. Personally, I think people who know me would say I blend masculine and feminine qualities. Although the Canadian Army did not think I had the qualities of leadership they wanted, in civilian life, I have exercised leadership, strength, and courage numerous times in emergencies. I have given emergency first aid to strangers at car accident scenes, to a man who suffered a grand mal seizure, and put out a fire that broke out in my house—a candle ignited a curtain that a stray gust of wind blew into the flame. By the time I retrieved the fire extinguisher, the flames had consumed the curtains in the front window of the house and were spreading across the ceiling. By the time the fire department arrived, the fire was out. The firefighters told me I had done a good job putting out the fire, and the insurance company was happy with me, because, as a friend said, “You saved them a piss pot full of money.” Interestingly, it was my military service where I learned to keep my cool in a crisis, to exercise leadership, to give emergency first aid, and to fight fires. In those situations, when I took the lead, those around me followed, and the crisis was brought to a successful conclusion. People who know me also tell me I have the gift of wisdom. They tell me I always know what to say when they are stressed or hurting. I offer more than banalities and platitudes in a difficult situation. They refer to this as an innate gentleness I possess. Yes, it puzzles them that I am a keen hunter. How can someone so gentle make the choice to go hunting and kill game birds and animals?

I am reminded of the “unique combination of attributes” from a documentary on hunting I watched many years ago. The film is called “In the Blood.” The film, made in 1989 by George Butler, documents the safari that descendants of Theodore Roosevelt retraced—the one he took with his son Kermit in 1909. The film provides insight into hunting in general and African big-game hunting in particular. The safari was led by a professional hunter, Robin Hurt, a man’s man and dedicated conservationist. In one segment, Butler’s thirteen-year-old son is taken on a hunt for a cape buffalo. Robin Hurt guided the boy on the hunt across the savanna and wetlands as they closed in on a herd of cape buffalo. When a buffalo was selected, the boy placed two shots into the animal, killing it cleanly. As he walked up to the carcass, tears welled up in his eyes, and he tried to fight them back. Robin Hurt, the great white hunter, seeing this, told the boy, “Don’t hold back. Let them flow; it’s a natural reaction.” Yes, I know how the boy felt. When you make the choice to kill a game animal or bird, the natural reaction is a feeling of triumph and sorrow. Hurt understood that and told the boy there was nothing shameful or unmanly in his reaction.

I am a keen hunter, but I am an actor, too. I have performed roles on stage and screen. Acting requires the ability to connect with your emotions and express them genuinely. It is challenging for me as I am not overly emotional. I do not frighten easily, and have the restraint to keep stupid people from baiting me. I tend to be stoic in my expression of grief, though there are notable exceptions. My maternal grandmother died two weeks after my thirtieth birthday. I had a close relationship with her. My family was surprised at how composed I was. I wrote and delivered the eulogy at her funeral. It was not until two years passed that I finally shed a few tears for her in the cathedral in Lyon, France. On the other hand, when I held my first dog, Christie, as she was euthanized, I cried harder than ever before in my life. For years, following Christie’s death, on the anniversary of her passing, I could not hold back my tears. I loved my grandmother and my dog, Christie, dearly, and I can not explain how I remained so calm and reserved when my grandmother died, and how I went to pieces when I lost Christie. I think my friends are correct. I am a “unique combination of attributes.” As I go through life, I apply these attributes the best I can. I am a man, and I have nothing to be ashamed of about my blend of masculine and feminine qualities.

Posted by Geoffrey

I was raised in a household where being gay was like, the most normal thing. My brother is gay, all of my best friends are gay. When my brother came out of the closet, it wasn’t a big deal for my family. — Ariana Grande

Leave a reply

Gay men have long been seen as a novelty, a standard deviation in the demographic where most of humanity is heterosexual. Attitudes toward male homosexuality varied throughout history. In Antiquity, for the Etruscans, Greeks, and Romans, it was a part of life. They understood that people were sexual, so same-sex liaisons were common and depicted in their artwork. With the development of the Abrahamic faiths, Judaism, Christianity, and Islam, male homosexuality was viewed in a critical light. Eventually, it was condemned in the Abrahamic faiths and in the wider society. Gay men lived and died through centuries where, at best, they were tolerated, sometimes, and at worst, persecuted and imprisoned. By the eighteenth century in England, the argument was advanced by the British philosopher, Jeremy Bentham, for the decriminalisation of homosexual behaviour between consenting adults in private, in his essay Offences Against Oneself. He wrote the essay around 1785, but it was published posthumously in 1931. Bentham thought homosexuality, as Jeffrey Weeks notes, “an ‘imaginary offence’ dependent on changing concepts of taste and morality.” (Wolfenden and beyond: the remaking of homosexual history) Bentham thought through the issue and reasoned:

To what class of offences shall we refer these irregularities of the venereal appetite which are stiled [sic] unnatural? When hidden from the public eye there could be no colour for placing them any where else: could they find a place any where it would be here. I have been tormenting myself for years to find if possible a sufficient ground for treating them with the severity with which they are treated at this time of day by all European nations: but upon the principle utility I can find none. (Offences Against Oneself)

However, in England and Wales, the passage of the Criminal Law Amendment Act 1885 (48 & 49 Vict. c.69) included Section 11, in particular the clause known as the Labouchere Amendment, which applied to male homosexuality. In short, the clause provided for a term of imprisonment “not exceeding two years”, with or without hard labour, for any man found guilty of “gross indecency” with another male, whether “in public or in private”. The Labouchere Amendment was enforced sparingly and selectively. However, the consequences of arrest and conviction could be devastating. John Gielgud very nearly saw his career as an actor come to an abrupt end in 1953 when a scandal arose over his arrest for ‘persistently importuning male persons for immoral purposes’ (he was caught trying to pick up a man in a public washroom). He was fined £10, and news of the arrest reached the press, causing him a most personal humiliation and the refusal of a visa to travel to the United States with his company to perform Shakespeare’s The Tempest. Gielgud was fortunate that the theatre-going public forgave his momentary indiscretion, and he continued his acting career both in the United Kingdom and the United States. Also, in 1953, the Home Secretary, David Maxwell Fyffe, referred to male homosexuality as a “plague over England,” and vowed to wipe it out. The Labouchere Amendment was repealed in English law in 1967—interestingly, a backbench Conservative Member of Parliament, Margaret Thatcher, broke ranks with the party to vote for its repeal. Since the decriminalisation of male homosexuality in England and Wales in 1967, many countries followed. It was decriminalised in Canada in 1969.

Now, in the twenty-first century, male homosexuality is seen by most as inconsequential. It is a natural expression of human sexuality. True, gay men remain a minority, but are free to take their place in society and live openly. Gay men marry and have families. They are represented in all occupations, and take part in a plurality of pastimes like anyone else. Unfortunately, for some, gay men remain a novelty. The series, Heated Rivalry, released by Crave, a Canadian streaming service, has become a worldwide hit with viewers. The series is based on novels by Rachel Reid, a Canadian author. I do not begrudge her success or the television series’s success, but what concerns me is that the story is pure fantasy. Yes, it is good writing and acting, absolutely, only it made me think of a quotation by Maria Von Trapp. When she saw the first production of The Sound of Music, she said, “That’s a nice story, but it’s not my story.” The story of two professional hockey players, one bisexual and the other gay, came from the imagination of a heterosexual woman. I am not saying there is anything wrong with that. Hardly, she is free to write stories about any characters she chooses. Though they say, “Art imitates life,” sometimes, particularly in romance novels, the lives of the characters are idealised beyond belief. The reality is that there is nothing novel about gay men living in the twenty-first century in most Western jurisdictions. There is no need to fashion romantic fantasies about how you imagine gay men live, how they feel, and what they think. The truth is, we are like everybody else, despite being a minority. There are plenty of openly gay professional athletes, including Jason Collins (an NBA player), Robbie Rogers (an NFL player), Tom Daley (a diver for the British Olympic team), Gus Kenworthy (a skier for the U.S. Olympic team), and Carl Nassib (an NFL player). I do not know much about the personal lives of these men, except for Tom Daley, whose private life is on the public record. Daley is married to his husband, Dustin Lance Black, and has two sons. They lead a conventional life like any other married couple. So, why are people so agog over a fantasy television series that treats the ordinary lives of gay men as something new and unusual?

Posted by Geoffrey

Love him and let him love you. Do you think anything else under heaven really matters? — James Baldwin

Leave a reply

Connor Storrie and Hudson Williams as Ilya Rozanov and Shane Hollander.

I noticed the sensation generated by the release of the series Heated Rivalry on Crave. It piqued my interest. I subscribed to Crave and settled in to watch the first episode of the series. Based on the first episode of the series, I expected the rest to be decidedly underwhelming. Thankfully, I found the following episodes much improved. I get what the storyline is about; at least I think so. The story is about two young men, one from Canada — his name is Shane Hollander — and the other from Russia — his name is Ilya Rozanov — who are rising stars in elite-level Junior Hockey and fierce competitors. They go on to become professional hockey players and captains of their respective teams. Each one has issues with his family and feels the pressures of navigating the byzantine world of professional hockey. Their story progresses through several years; along the way, they found they had a mutual sexual attraction. That further complicated things for them.

Continue reading →

When I joined the military it was illegal to be homosexual, then it became optional, and now it’s legal. I’m getting out before the Democrats make it mandatory. — Sgt. Harry Berres, USMC

Leave a reply

A gay Marine greets his husband upon his return from a deployment.

The Netflix series “Boots” is not “woke garbage,” as the United States Department of Defence alleged. No, while it is fiction, it is good storytelling. I admit, when I saw the trailer and the still images, a part of me rolled my eyes. I suspected it might be a cheesy rom-com featuring queeny ephebes prancing through the United States Marine Corps boot camp. On the contrary, the protagonist, Cameron Cope, is a gay seventeen-year-old high school graduate who chose military service, specifically the Marines, because his good friend had enlisted, and he wanted a change. The story is set in 1990, when male homosexuality was grounds for refusal in enlistment and grounds for discharge. He was reminded of that upon arrival at Parris Island, where a sign at the entrance for induction listed reasons for disqualification that included homosexuality. He kept his homosexuality to himself, though those around him suspected that he was gay.

The U.S. Department of Defense was clear when it issued the following regulation to clarify its stand in 1981:

(DOD Directive 1332.14 (Enlisted Administrative Separations), January 1981)

Homosexuality is incompatible with military service. The presence in the military environment of persons who engage in homosexual conduct or who, by their statements, demonstrate a propensity to engage in homosexual conduct, seriously impairs the accomplishment of the military mission. The presence of such members adversely affects the ability of the armed forces to maintain discipline, good order, and morale; to foster mutual trust and confidence among service members; to ensure the integrity of the system of rank and command; to facilitate assignment and worldwide deployment of service members who frequently must live and work in close conditions affording minimal privacy; to recruit and retain members of the armed forces; to maintain the public acceptability of military service; and to prevent breaches of security.

Under this regulation, persons having homosexual proclivities were deemed unfit for military service and either refused induction into military service or quietly mustered out with either a general, undesirable or dishonorable discharge if found out after having been inducted. The consequences of the three types of discharge varied in degree of severity. Still, in each, the individual was ineligible for veterans’ benefits and could face discrimination in employment in civilian life. That was the reality in 1990. The Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell policy in the United States Military was not enacted until 1993. So, serving in the U.S. Military in 1990 as a gay man meant you had to conceal the truth about yourself on pain of serious consequences.

As the story unfolded, it was revealed that one of the drill instructors, Staff Sergeant Sullivan, a seasoned Marine with a distinguished service record and a recipient of the Silver Star, was a gay man. Despite his impeccable record, he came under investigation when a man, a Major in the Marine Corps, with whom he had a romance, was outed and dismissed from the service. Despite the support of his commanding officer and enlisted colleagues, he chose to nearly beat a man to death in a bar fight, knowing it would result in a dishonorable discharge from the service. In his estimation, a conviction of aggravated assault of a civilian was preferable to being outed and dismissed in disgrace as a homosexual. The tragedy in his case was that had he held on another three years, he could have continued his career in the Marines—the U.S. Department of Defense is correct in pointing out that in 2025, gay men are free to serve openly. The Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell policy and the general ban on gays serving in the military were lifted in 2011. “Boots,” however, is set in 1990, when gay men did not have the option of serving with discretion, let alone openly. So, no, “Boots” is not “woke garbage,” it is well-written and superbly acted by the stellar cast. I highly recommend watching the series.

Posted by Geoffrey

Those who forget the past are condemned to repeat it. — George Santayana

Leave a reply

I am watching a Spanish Netflix series called Merli: Sapere Aude, and it is excellent. It is a dramedy, and the plot revolves around the protagonist, a young man named Pol Rubio, played by a fine young Spanish actor named Carlos Cuevas. Pol is a young man in his first year of studies in philosophy at a university in Barcelona. He has a bisexual orientation, and though he favours men, he does have dalliances with women occasionally. Pol is an anti-hero; while he generally strives to do good, he betrays a friend and his father when it serves his interests. He learns in the first episode of season two that he is HIV+. Pol is devastated by the news, despite the doctor’s assurance that the virus can be managed with treatment. He starts the regimen of taking the medication and tries to carry on. In a subsequent episode, Pol converses with a former co-worker who likely exposed him to the virus. His friend lost his job when the employer learned he was HIV+. The friend reminds Pol that people will feel sorry for you when you get cancer, but when you get HIV, you are viewed as a “dirty faggot.” Pol also converses with his employer, a mature gay man living with HIV. The employer lived through the AIDS crisis of the 1980s and 1990s and saw many gay men succumb to the disease. He recounted an incident where a friend was beaten to death for being queer. I bristled when I heard “queer” used to refer to a gay man, but I realized in the context of the anecdote that it was the attackers who called him a queer as they beat him to death. Queer is a slur, the last thing many gay men heard as they were beaten to death by gangs of thugs.

Continue reading →

I consider promiscuity immoral. Not because sex is evil, but because sex is too good and too important. — Ayn Rand

Leave a reply

In the summer of 1987, I lived with my boyfriend Fabio in a two-bedroom apartment in Kingston, Ontario. We met as students at Queen’s University and secretly carried on our love affair before moving in together. We became boyfriends during the burgeoning AIDS crisis. One evening, we sat in bed and watched a panel discussion held by one of the American News Networks–I cannot remember which one. What struck me was the inflammatory opening remark made by a conservative Congressman, whose name I do not remember, who asserted that “perversion and promiscuity” were to blame for the AIDS crisis. That sentiment was shared through the 1980s. I remember the stand-up comic Sam Kinison, who screamed in one of his routines that AIDS became an epidemic “because a few fags fuck some monkeys; they got tired of their own assholes.” Jerry Falwell claimed it was God’s judgement on homosexuals and blamed the spread of the disease into the innocent heterosexual population on bisexual men. Yes, AIDS was seen as a gay plague. Fabio and I, like countless gay men in the 1980s, were concerned. There was uncertainty about how easily the virus was transmitted. Before the dawn of the AIDS crisis, our biggest concern as students in the 1980s was the risk of an unwanted pregnancy or getting herpes.

Continue reading →

Gentlemen, you may include me out. — Samuel Goldwyn

Leave a reply

I declined an audition recently. The audition call was for an actor to play a senior gay man, a closeted gay man married to a lesbian who had children and grandchildren. They enthusiastically come out late in life, embracing their “queerness” in all its grotesque flamboyance. The role is a lead for a series of ten episodes. I am okay with playing a gay man on screen, provided I can play him straight. By that, I mean playing a man who is gay. I am uncomfortable playing a gay man as a caricature, even in jest. That resembles a black actor playing a minstrel show role in jest. Mainly as I am on record for criticism of queer culture, I think that queer culture is demeaning and detrimental to the well-being and happiness of gay men and boys. I said in the note explaining my decision to drop the audition that the role was outside my character type. My character type is the mature father figure. As an older gay man, I do not want to risk being typecast as an older, flamboyant homosexual.

Continue reading →

Time makes us sentimental. Perhaps, in the end, it is because of the time that we suffer. — André Aciman

Leave a reply

This is what a gay high school boy looked like in 1979.

I like gay romance in print and on film. The positive portrayal of romance and intimacy between two men or high school boys is lovely. Gay youth and men exist and have the same need for love and companionship as the heterosexual majority. Especially given that in Western society, intimacy between men was criminalized for a long time–it was considered “gross indecency” and punishable by imprisonment. Beyond that, public prejudice was prevalent throughout the 20th century. I remember it well. Recently, I met up with a man I knew in high school. We had not seen each other since graduation in 1980. We met through a mutual friend and ex of mine. I had no idea that my high school buddy was gay. We are both in our sixties and retired. I am happily partnered, and he is single. It was good to see him again.

Continue reading →

Olivier said that drama is an affair of the heart, or it’s nothing, and he was right. — Pam Gems

Leave a reply

Joe Locke and Kit Connor as Charlie and Nick in Heartstopper.

I watched season two of the charming Netflix series Heartstopper. I liked it despite it being aimed at a much younger audience. What drew me to the series was the gay storyline; the romance between the two protagonists, the high school boys Nick and Charlie. The series is a drama, although it pulls its punches. The boys never go past kissing and cuddling in their relationship. Also, Nick is bisexual, and Charlie is gay. It is cute and appealing to its teenage audience. I like that a teenage gay romance is portrayed as a positive thing. Coincidentally, the actors who play Nick and Charlie are, like the characters they play, gay and bisexual. Kit Connor, who plays Nick, declared his bisexuality. Joe Locke, who plays Charlie, is openly gay. That the young actors are gay and bisexual is interesting. It is nice that they are free to be themselves.

Continue reading →

If you were expecting Prince Charming, I’m sorry. He’s with his boyfriend. ― Shayla Black

Leave a reply

Central to the story is the romance between two high school boys.

I discovered an enchanting Netflix series, a drama called Young Royals. I found it browsing titles with the keywords gay romance. The series is Swedish, the cast are Swedes, and the dialogue is in Swedish. The conversation is dubbed into English with subtitles inserted to translate text messages, emails, and the like. The premise of the series rests on the protagonist, Prince Wilhelm, the younger son of the Swedish Royal family and his desire to live an everyday life. His elder brother, Prince Erik, the Crown Prince, is heir to the throne and groomed for his role as King. Wilhelm is the spare. As much as he wants an everyday life, his mother, Queen Kristina of Sweden, reminds him that his life as a prince is a privilege, not a burden.

On that premise, Prince Wilhelm tries to fit in at the posh boarding school he is sent to; he wants to be like the other students. But, at the same time, he has to keep up appearances and avoid bringing shame on his family and the institution of the monarchy. The plot thickens when Wilhelm is smitten by a classmate, Simon, a student of Swedish and South American ethnicity and a commoner. Simon returns his feelings, and romance blossoms. Unfortunately, the untimely death of Crown Prince Erik in a car crash forces Wilhelm to step into the role of Crown Prince. That only tightens the restrictions on how he conducts his personal life. When a cousin clandestinely shoots a video of Wilhelm and Simon in bed together and uploads it to social media, the proverbial shit hits the fan.

Yes, the subplots deal with issues that are universal for humanity: namely, honour, shame, duty, class distinctions, love, friendship, betrayal, dysfunction, drug and alcohol addiction, and the lengths families will go to avoid scandal. For example, the royal family covers up the scandal of Crown Prince Wilhelm’s romance with Simon with a disingenuous denial that it is Wilhelm in the video. Another student is sacrificed to keep the Crown Prince out of an incident involving illicit drug use at the school. Avoiding shame and maintaining personal honour are powerful motivations, not just for royals.

There is much to like about Young Royals. The casting is superb. What struck me is that they chose actors and actresses who did not have the perfect Nordic features. That is not to say they are unattractive; instead, they look like the people watching the series. One usually expects the cast in teen drama series to have perfect complexions and chiselled figures. Instead, the characters look like people you see in everyday life. The characters are not larger than life, as is the reality of royal families in continental Europe; Crown Prince Wilhelm and the rest of his extended family dress and carry themselves as middle-class Swedes. The actors and actresses play their roles superbly.

Season two of Young Royals started in November. I eagerly anticipated watching new episodes. The idea of a Crown Prince who is gay and wants an everyday life, including his love affair with another boy, a commoner, confronting the realities of royal duties, including taking a wife and producing an heir to the throne, intrigues me. The second season maintained the quality established in the first six episodes of season one. Netflix will conclude the series with a third and final season in the new year. It is wise to end the series this way. There is only so far the writers can take the storyline before it gets stale. Also, the cast are rapidly outgrowing their roles. I hope the final season is as good as the first two and brings a resolution to the story.

Posted by Geoffrey